Morty's Back! Re-embodied and Ready to Rock-n-Roll. (Or at Least Put on Some Light Jazz and Take a Nap.)
Morty's Miraculous Return
A few years ago Uncle Morty suffered a series of unfortunate accidents that left him in pieces. Literally. Work was out of the question, of course. Complaining not so much. Who can blame him? Being reduced to a head and a pile of bones can't be a pleasant fate.
Fortunately, it turned out that his metaphysical disorder left open the possibility that he could be re-embodied in a whole new set of bones. After some amount of searching and a few false starts, his new body was obtained. The next question was how to move the old grump from one to the other. We researched rituals and spells at length, but it turned out that all he needed was a five year old who loved him very much to turn on his eyes and Voila! Morty had a brand new body.
He says he's glad to be back and he's ready to answer your questions—though he doesn't seem overly eager to start blogging again. If anyone wants to ask him a question, ask advice, or otherwise contact him, as always, you can do that through the Sacred Chickens Facebook Page or at email@example.com. Make sure to put Morty's name in the subject line, so I don't accidentally read his emails. If you are okay with it, he can answer your question on the blog in his advice column.
Here's some of Morty's previous advice to readers:
Mortimer Richard Wolcott is, quite frankly, not very forthcoming with his bio. We're not even sure if that's his real name. His work during his previous embodiments is not something he'll willingly share. He also won't explain why he's currently assigned to the world of the living. His deathography is somewhat clear only from the point at which he showed up at Sacred Chickens Farm for a Halloween Party and never left. He is occasionally pressed into service to help write the blog and you can search the archives here for his wisdom. He enjoys hanging out with cats, the occasional cocktail, and dispensing sarcastic remarks to the living.