Sacred Chickens
  • Sacred Chickens Blog
  • Books, Podcasts, and Other Fun Stuff
  • Contact
  • Sacred Chickens Blog
  • Books, Podcasts, and Other Fun Stuff
  • Contact

An Interview With Uncle Morty

8/15/2016

0 Comments

 
Picture
 
An interview with Uncle Morty
 

 
As some of you may know, Uncle Morty, is Sacred Chickens’ best loved (and…okay…only) blogging skeleton. He mysteriously came to stay with us after a Halloween party a few years ago and somehow never left.  Morty doesn’t like to talk about himself too much.  He’s been a little close with his history, although he does occasionally dispense his wisdom in the form of a blog post or a pithy saying.  But for the first time, he’s agreed to sit down and talk about himself.
 
 
Q:  The first thing I really must ask is why you have a tendency to talk about yourself in the third person? Some people find it a little disconcerting.  Maybe even off putting.
 
A:  Well, your Uncle Morty hasn’t had a very comfortable relationship with himself since he lost his suit of skin.  Without a heart beating inside these old bones and a head full of matter and electricity, Uncle Morty hasn’t exactly felt like a “self.”  He experiences consciousness in a much less physically unified way you or your readers.  It’s difficult to explain for him to explain exactly what he means across such a wide existential gulf.  But if you think it will help insure that your readers are not “put off,” the poor delicate flowers, your Uncle Morty, excuse me, “I” can try to use the first person more often in my writing.  Of all people, I understand that concessions must be made to the flesh.
 
Q:  Question number two is something that I’ve never really been comfortable enough to ask you and even now I’m not sure how to phrase it.  Ummm…can you help the reader understand your “condition”…I guess what I’m trying to say is…
 
A:  I get what you’re trying so eloquently to say.  (For those of you reading who may not know your Uncle Morty so well…please infuse the previous sentence with a healthy dose of sarcasm).  Quit pussy footing around.  I’m dead.  That’s my condition.  I’m not really permitted to go into the metaphysics of my state (nor would you have any hope of understanding the technicalities involved.)  But I will say this:  it’s certainly not a reward. I prefer to think of it as not exactly a punishment either.  It was presented to your Uncle Morty as an opportunity – a sort of correction if you will. 
 
And before you ask…I would prefer not to answer questions about my previous embodiments at this time.  I will dispense such information on a need to know basis.  And I sincerely doubt that anyone will need to know anytime soon.  I would hate for the information to be...misapplied.
 
Q:  I wasn’t actually trying to be nosy about your previous life.  So let’s change the subject back to your current…errrr….existence.  How did you end up here at Sacred Chickens farm?  No one at the party can exactly remember asking you.  Not that we weren’t happy to see you, of course.  It was Halloween, after all.
 
A:  The Universe has a strange way of working itself out, doesn’t it?  And by that I do not mean that it has a plan.  Merely that it has a strange way of working itself out.   You may take that as you like. I do love bonfires and marshmallows by the way.  That was delightful.  Although the beer and condiment selections left something to be desired. 
 
Could we please move on to the next question?
 
Q:  What do you see in your future?  Anything you want to accomplish? 
 
A:  Well, I’m coming off a difficult period physically, literally losing my head for a bit, as you well know.  I think it’s definitely time for Uncle Morty to begin sharing his wisdom again.  I’m also thinking of starting an advice column for the living and perhaps writing my Automortography. Also, I’d love to update my wardrobe and spend more time meditating.  My favorite hobby, startling people, will take a bit more social effort (and possibly skill) on your part.  In the meantime, perhaps I’ll take up knitting.
 
Incidentally, if anyone craves Uncle Morty’s advice or simply to share a story with him...errr... me, please send your clearly stated fears, problems or opinions to [email protected] with Mort-uary in the subject line. 
 
Q:  Anything else you want to say to the readers?
 
A:  The same advice I always give to fleshlings.  Don’t be Dead while you’re Alive.  Be Alive.  You’ll be resting your bare skull on a guest room pillow and being asked to write blog posts soon enough.


0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    ​BUY NOW!

    Click Photo above to buy ebook or paperback from Amazon.

    ​Here's the link to
    Barnes and Noble

    Or order through your favorite independent bookstore!​
    email Julie

    Categories

    All
    Author Spotlight
    Blog Post
    Digging In
    Essay
    Film/Tv Review
    Gardening
    Music Review
    Original Poem
    Original Story
    Poetry
    Politics
    Random Thoughts
    Recommendations
    Review
    Uncle Morty
    Uncle Morty On Writing
    Weekend Reading
    Writing Contest

    Archives

    March 2025
    February 2025
    January 2025
    December 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    March 2024
    January 2024
    October 2023
    June 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013

    RSS Feed